Wednesday, January 14, 2015


Struggling for the energy again.

A lot of that is due to lacking sleep again. I just can't seem to hit that mental program that sends me off to snoozeland quickly. The healing is on and off, sometimes it improves, sometimes it gets set back. Some of that is due to me fidgeting when I can't sleep.

Next week will be fun. I have a few away trips which will lead to very long days. But that's ok because the car is very easy to drive and I'm sensible enough to stop and have a coffee or hot chocolate if I detect myself flagging. You really don't want to go to sleep at 70mph.

That's weird isn't it. I'm having to fight sleep in things like presentations (sorry dude, it's not you!) and in the evenings when I'm watching stuff. But when I go to bed ? A feeling of can't keep eyes open goes away and I just can't ... sleep ...

Depression is linking with that too. I'd expected to be all healed up by now and seeing the bad bits (and knowing that I make them worse by fidgeting) reminds me that I've still got a decent way to go. But it is genuinely getting better.

Sorry to burden everyone else with my problems. Sometimes you have to do this in order to properly express them, adequately understand them and in the end, find a useful way to deal with the problems.
What am I doing in my current mental funk ?

At the moment, it's episode 9 of Long Way Round, which has Ewan McGregor and friend Charlie Boorman riding from London to New York via Russia. It's a good series, 10 episodes long and I'll finish watching it tonight. I'll hopefully pick up a copy of the second series, Long Way Down and then watch that.

I've been appreciating the smiles.

Yesterday, one of the bus people recognised me and had a chat, all the way to where I get off. That's nice, being remembered. It's a sign that you matter, which always helps counter that depression. That was a nice chat. I had people break into smiles this morning with my scarf too.

And Snow Queen smiles too ! SQ is great. She's been through a lot and still keeps that cheeky, chirpy personality shining through, brightening the day.

Completely random ladies see me and smile. That's awesome.

Last but most appreciated, Cupid's Gift.

There's a realistic engineering thought that if we colonise low gravity places like the Moon, an efficient way of getting around is in rocket buggies. These blast off from the ground, go into a suborbital trajectory, before coming down to a soft landing lots of miles away from the initial blast off point. That's my personality when I get a text from little Skye. On a suborbital jaunt.

She does make me smile. And she likes stuff I like. I hopefully bring a smile out of her too.

Wait a minute ... If she likes stuff I like, that means :
I better scoff the Mini Eggs quick.

Cya !

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