Monday, November 30, 2015

Alphabet of the Human Heart - E and F

How are people finding these ?

I'm liking them so far. Cheers to Cupid's Gift for buying me the book and giving me the idea :-). I think I write better when I have simple cues to ramble on about, with a limit on to make sure I don't Wall of Text too much.

Today's A to Z starts with E for Ego.

To truly live, live for others. The less it is about you, the more it will come to you. The only thing between you and your happiness is your ego, let it go.

Great thoughts as usual. I have an ego, although it can be buried beneath other feelings. I got used to being the smartest person at school, then when it came to the cricket I was always the fastest player on the field and had a good few games where I effectively won the game on my own as a bowler. I'm valued in certain areas at work too (not talking about work at the moment) where a few groups want to keep me doing what I'm doing. That can lead to an ego developing.

But ...
You only get smart by listening to your teachers. There were a good few who could have been as smart but they fell into the rebel group and sabotaged their own futures. I stopped listening to my teachers after a while (got bored with repetition) and got lower grades at uni than I should have done. Ego interfered.
I was the fastest on the field but speed is no use without skill.
My bowling won a few games but we needed to have the runs on the board from the batsmen to give a target to defend.
Work is ... not something for here at the moment.

Ego can lead to arrogance very easily, which can easily lead to isolation. Letting go of your ego leads you to be a more welcoming, nicer individual. We aren't the best at very much but we can be very good at things without rubbing it in. When I ran a computer help needed forum, I was seen as He Who Knows All. But I would try and welcome in new ideas. I was seen as knowledgeable because I left alone the questions where I didn't know an answer and encouraged the ideas of those who did know useful answers.

E is also for Enthusiam.
Yes optimistic cat, we do like you. Most of the time.

Let your enthusiasm lift you higher. Wherever it takes you, it will be the right place. To get all you can from life, put all you can into it.

I'm struggling for enthusiasm at the moment. I suspect I have a form of Seasonal Affective Disorder, which makes me struggle when the nights draw in early. This time of year, the curtains in the house stay shut to keep the warm in because I don't see daylight outside of working hours.

I have enthusiasm, it just gets suppressed. At the moment, I'm excited for :
Seeing Cupid's Gift again in a fortnight ! Can't come quick enough.
The end of the cricket - Pakistan vs England on a time delay recording.
The Yogscast charity December livestreams, mostly worth a watch*.
*(some of them have massive egos which put me off)
Getting to Bath Xmas market for the first time in years.
Work Xmas munchies, should be decent fun.
Xmas period with lots of sleep.
And more.

F ? F is for Fear.
Yes basement cat. Fear is the mindkiller (and the rest of that quote).

Fear holds you back. Scared of something ? Face it down. You can do it ! Taking that step to face down a fear is really, really tough ! But it's worth it to take that first step towards beating something you fear. How about me ?

I was scared of escalators that went down (moving stairs, not lifts). I think my fear was of tipping forward and having a tumble. I'm still wobbly with them but I don't default to the stairs instead of the down escalator now. Probably a good thing with my fragile legs.

When Nose Job 1 happened, I was relieved that I had chance to bat again before the end of that season. That was so late into the season that we only actually played one more game that year before the darkness and rains set in. It was maybe ... 4 weeks after Nose Job 1 ? I think I played either the same week or the week after Nose Job 2, where the nose was straightened (mostly - there's still a little kink). I'm glad I did, I didn't get many runs but it let me face down that fear of being hit by the ball before it had chance to fester over the winter.

Face your fears. Analyse them. Ask - "why does this scare me ?" and the answer may be something you find silly enough to banish that fear.

F is for Fun. Nope. It's actually for Friendship as well, where would we be without friends to have fun with.

It's cheaper than therapy and often goes deeper. Our friends know our history like no therapist could. They detect our pain. They make us laugh.

Look out for your friends and they'll look out for you. If life is a game, your friends are your team. Choose them carefully, cherish those who feed your strengths. And in return, be encouraged when you can encourage them.

A friend will always be there to say "I understand, I'm here for you, how can I help?"

We have to let them do that. And sometimes, pick up on the cues where the friend needs help but doesn't know how to ask. Friends are amazing.

I have a few good friends and a few special ones. I cherish them all and am over the moon when they let me help them. Or even when they share things with me that they needed to talk about. Sharing means trust and that's the root of the best friendships.

And that goes for everyone reading this far too ! I share a decent amount here and you're all welcome. There are filters ... but I try and be as open as discretion allows me to be.

Stay friendly :-).

PS Oops - forgot link to book - sorted! This is a link to the book.

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