Tuesday, September 02, 2014

Dining for one

There's a kind of social stigma attached to that isn't there ?

I mean - going out to a restuarant on your own to have a meal out. And there's a few reasons that people would like to push on you for feeling bad about it :

1 - The "can't you find a girlfriend ?" factor. There's a definite social stigma to being single. Our psychology tells us that it's not normal. We're biologically programmed to be in relationships. Well - I have a couple of things to say about that :

It's tough to meet people these days. Route 1 is to meet people at school or uni. Well, I went to a boys school and wasn't very interested (that way) in the lads there. I had a long term relationship going at uni but that one was sadly doomed. Work is an option but I dunno - I'm not sure if you should mix work and relationships.

That said, I know a small number of ladies at work who are : Pretty, Interesting, Give Great Smile and Funny. But there's that barrier between chatting to them at work and asking if they'd like to join you for a drink. There's a lack of knowledge where people keep their private lives out of work, which is one thing that contributes to not knowing what the answer to the drink question might be. I wonder if some people in the office think I'm involved with someone outside of work.

I've also been using the Okcupid site for a little while now. And ... shock horror ... have actually contacted a few people on me. The resounding response there is sadly ... silence. (I send hopefully nice messages that show I've read the profile) Ok, I have had a few conversations on there but they've gone no where.

I'm very curious about one lady on there though. I recognise her from something else. Which is I think a big problem for her, because I think a lot of other people may recognise her too. I think she's looking for someone who won't want in on what she works on. But I think the responses have made her think the people are more interested in what she does than who she is. And it's led to her deleting not one but two profiles on that site.

So if that wonderful little sweetheart recognises herself there, I follow what she works on but I'm not particularly interested in being involved. It's a bit too public ... Plus there's big chance of spoilers and I do like following her work.

No - I see the person behind the work and am very interested in knowing more. If I got that chance. But ... it's getting that interest that's the problem.

I was talking about Dining Solo wasn't I ?

If you're looking for a meal out but don't have someone to have along with you, don't hesitate. Go anyway !

You have as much a right to be in that restuarant as anyone else. Plus if you're on your own, you aren't inflicting screaming kiddies on everyone else in the place. Or running kiddies. Or interpersonal drama.

I'd say it may actually be more socially acceptable to dine on your own than dine with people who really don't know how to behave in public. I can accept the behaviour of the kiddies there but not the attitude of the parents/owners/guardians. If the kiddies misbehave, it's the responsibility of the people who put them in that position.

And I'm rambling.

I'll continue the Harvester "Eat All Meals On Menu" quest although it'll take me ages. (I'll only go when I go shopping) and I'll go to other places too. I've become a fan of the Frankie & Benny pasta, although the last one was burned in places ...

Don't be ashamed or otherwise have negative feelings about eating out on your own. Do it anyway.

That said, I miss the intimacy of an evening out with a loved one.


  1. I like eating out on my own. Plenty of time to look around, read a book in between courses and, of course, no problem chatting up the waitress... [grin]

  2. Haha - I wonder how long before the waitresses at the Harvester start recognising me ...


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