Monday, February 03, 2014

Thoughts on sizes and shapes

I've been seeing a few things lately about people's size and shape.

People like to criticize, people love to comment. People judge. People bully. People try to impose their world view on others. And nothing more than the subject of size :

They're fat ! They're skinny ! They're too tall ! They're too skinny !

I don't hold with that. We are all, to a certain extent, tied to a certain size and shape. Our bodies will tend to a certain size and shape, whatever we do to try and change that. Some people will be big, some tiny, some ultra-skinny, some super-cuddly. And you know what ?

All those shapes have their own kind of beauty.

We should never judge a person by their size and shape. To do so is assuming that we know all about the history of what made them that way. It assumes we know their genetics, that we know their habits, in some way their ethics (vegetarianism is another thing I'd never judge someone for and I hope I'm not judged for having omnivore ethics).

In my case, I have thin and tall person genes from my dad's side bumping up against healthy short genes on my mum's side. It combines to make someone spectacularly ... average. Lol. And then my snack habits come in to make me a little bigger than I should be. I have a couple of reasons to watch my own weight as if I get too large :

I can't run Very Fast
It affects my breathing
My knees decide they don't like me any more

It's that middle one that's the most important thing. We should never comment on someone else's size and shape. Sure, I do worry about some people but I won't add to their own problems by being cruel enough to point it out. And the worry is more about their health than any conforming to an ideal. If I stress, I reach for the biscuits and that rarely helps with the diet. I bet I'm not alone with that reaction to stress ;-) I'll judge my own size but I'd never inflict that judgment on another.

Weight bites on two fronts :

The ones who starve themselves to fit the supermodel shape. Please ! Don't do this. A person who is starving skin and bones is not nearly as attractive as someone with healthy curves. Curves are a good thing.
(Note "starving" - I know someone who is ultra thin, whatever they do. I bet most of the dieters of the world would envy her genes !)
The ones who are past that point of "large" that they incur other medical problems. There's only so much space in here, the breathing problems I mention above is when the chubbiness squeezes my lungs. That's not happened for ages though and it was probably allergies anyway.
The ones who over exercise. And I mean that. There were two gents in Bristol centre at the weekend trying to attract people into their gym. If it meant being their shape (they had big muscles but it had apparently turned to fat), then I'm off running in the other direction. And being too fit can have its disadvantages, I have too much muscle in my legs and it causes painful problems with the knees and shins.

But I do know a few people who are past that healthy point of large. One I believe is in a viscious circle where the medication to let her breathe more easily makes her bigger, which means there's less space for her lungs, which makes it harder to breathe. That's an example of where someone's history affects their natural size. They can't help being bigger than they should be and we should not be making them feel worse about a problem they are already fully aware of due to living with it.

I'll reiterate - whatever size we are, there is beauty in all sizes and shapes.

Unless, we decide to mar that beauty by inflicting a false world view on others. Like expecting everyone to fit into supermodel shapes. The supermodel shape is not natural and never will be.

Don't worry about not fitting into an ideal. Be the shape you are meant to be. Embrace it. And remember - big means bigger hugs.

Whatever size someone is, they will still get that massive trademark Sleepypete Grin if I see them. And you know what ? The Grin earned several Pretty Lady Smiles in return today. And that's from all shapes and sizes. I see the beauty in all of those and I think that translates through to the Big Grin.

Everyone is beautiful in their own way. Size matters not. Especially if there's a smile involved.

Cos a smile from a Pretty Lady is guaranteed to make my day.

PS If you see comments like "little lady" here, it tends to be about height. If they're shorter than me, they're "little", if they're taller than me ... hmm. Come to think of it, doesn't happen that often ! But I won't use "big" cos that can be totally taken the wrong, judging, way.

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